Saturday, November 22, 2008

I Am OH So Tired of This

Can I just say that they should not call it anything close to CHILD Protective Services. It seems that the only thing the department has protected our children from is a loving, stable, and permanent family. Thanks guys, really dodged that bullet kiddos.

Today we had a visit, and I don't know if it's the transporter's job to upset everyone, but she has a knack for it. I do a dump and run, because I don't want to be accused of hovering over Mama's time. The other foster parent stays and then gives me the run down. He pulled me aside after the visit and told me that the kids that were placed in the same town as Mama had been going on weekend visits, and they are planning on starting weekend visits with ours after the next hearing on 12/3. He told me a bunch of other things that the transporter said.

I called the ex-mother-in-law who has one of the kids in the sibling group. She confirmed that the local kids were going to unsupervised in home visits every Saturday. She also told me that mama's psychiatrist had recommended weekend visits, the department said no visits, and the judge compromised and made the visits Saturday only.

Ex-MIL told me that she has also been told, like myself and one of the other foster parents, that the department is going to ask for termination in December. What we don't understand is that if they are less than six weeks from terminating, why are they starting in home unsupervised visits? The kids have been in care for over four years, there have never been any unsupervised visits, why would they start unsupervised visits less than six weeks before they terminate rights?

I spoke to CPS this week and they told me that there were no significant changes. Wait, unsupervised visits aren't significant? Of course, I haven't even seen my CPS caseworker since July, and the only reason I saw him then was that he was forced by the judge to lay eyes on the kids before we took them on vacation.

I have long since concluded that the department is either dishonest or incompetent, or that there is a larger criminal force at work here. Remember this is the department who couldn't find a criminal record on someone who was sitting in jail on a probation violation. Why, because they forgot that one can also commit federal crimes. Oops. It frightens me that the welfare of my children are in these hands.

We have been cautioned by our attorney to not distinguish our kids from the sibling group, as that might leave the sibling group vulnerable to reunification. It is easier to reunify three than six. Yet, I am at the point that I don't care. I need to look out for my children, and my family.

I MUST remember that God is in control. I would like it most if we could sit down and speak Mommy to Mama, but it has been forbidden. So, this is something that I will have to leave to Him. I hate it, I want to be able to do something. This is not what I envisioned when I took that call four years ago. This all must stop, and soon.

6 comments:

hsmomma5 said...

My prayers are with you, Annie. Although I have not had the exact experience you are having (since we did not foster, just did straight adoptions through DHS), I can still understand your frustration with the "system" (using that term loosley...).

I agree, its not the child that is being looked out for. If it's been four years and Mama hasn't gotten her act together enough to get her kids back, it ain't happening! They need to quit jerking kids around and give them the stabilty they need so you can give them a normal life.

I could blather on and on for days about this, so I'll just shut up now. :)

Just Me said...

Wow. 4 years. This needs to be resolved. I'll be thinking about your family and hoping that things work out the way that's best.

Megan said...

I am so sorry ya'll have to go through all this turmoil. Praying for you and your babies.

JustTheFactsMa'am said...

They are NOT Child Protective Services. I'm beginning to believe that the stories that turn out well are the exception rather than the rule.

Praying for you and the kiddos.

On the other hand, six weeks is coming quickly!

Tiffany said...

Oh Annie, That just totally sucks to no end. You are their MOM!!! Period! The kids know that. I'm sorry you have to go through all this. I think of you all the time. YOu are hero in your childrens eyes and mine as well. God can take over. He will!
love you and miss you all!

Sugar-n-Spice said...

yes, something smells very fishy. very fish, indeed.

other than the obvious, are you doing ok? what says the attorney?